If we were having coffee…

If we were having coffee I’d order an iced coffee with a fun flavor shot, like cookie dough or mocha…black. I would say something about how much I life this place (hopefully we’re at a quaint little coffee shop somewhere). Then I would get down to it and still my brain.

I’d tell you about how coffee and I have became quite good friends. And then I’d tell you how I have been really needing a friend because I feel so lost. I have never been more uncertain about my life than I do right now. Sure, I’d tell you about my ideas and goals about what my plans are to do next, like apply to colleges and look for jobs in my field, but in reality I can hardly see my future past this very day.

Yes, there are all of these goal and things I want to do but I have no clue how to do them at all, where to start or if it will even be worth the trouble. I feel like I am going through the motions, waking up to just another day and waiting to go to a job that I am not thrilled about and then collecting a paycheck so that I can go on living the same life. Of corse there are other “fun” things that I get to do but as a whole there is hardly anything good or extraordinary about me.

I feel like a ball of anxiety without a clue on how to change anything.

I would talk to you about how I feel like I am on the verge of a quarter life crisis, if not already there. Sometimes I wonder if I wasted my time because I am in the wrong major or life path. It is just so hard for me to see where I am going to be a week, a month, a year from now. Let alone these “5 year plans” that people always seem to be talking about.

If we were having coffee…

Hopefully you would be an awesome friend and actually listen to this nonsense because we both know that I am acting really dumb but right now I can’t really help it. Hopefully you would say that you understand what’s going on in my mind because all anyone ever asks you, post-graduation is what your plans are in life. But who knows that? I don’t.

I usually end up saying that I’m unsure and mention the things that have been floating around in my head. And then they just give me that concerned disapproving look.

Sort of starting to get to me.


If we were having coffee…

I would ask you about your family and what sort of drama is going on in your life because there isn’t much that is better than a good story. Especially if it is ridiculous. I’d be so grateful for the distraction.

I’d ask what your plans are even though I just talked about how much I hated when that question was asked but you’re my best friend so its okay because we need to be on the same page. I’ll secretly be relieved when you’re not quite sure either. You actually have a set of plans that may actually work out, but because I know you, I know you’re just as worried too.


16 thoughts on “#WeekendCoffeeShare

  1. When I’m feeling anxious and unsure about life, I try to remind myself that life is all about the journey, not the destination. Majorly clichΓ©, I know, but I do think it’s really useful advice. So many of us are so worried about where we’re gonna be in five years, but we won’t be anywhere in five years if we don’t focus on the now. My opinion? Five year plans are stupid. It’s so hard to focus on the now sometimes–I know that all too well–but I think trying will lead to a much more rewarding life. Oh man, I feel like this is getting preachy. Sorry! Anywho, don’t think you’ve wasted your major or your life. You probably wouldnt be who you are today without those experiences. Even if you don’t end up in a field related to your college major, so what? Is that really the worst thing that could happen in life? Hang in there! Even if life seems a little crappy now doesn’t mean it will be like this forever. πŸ™‚

  2. Ugh. The 5-year-plan question. That question is so dumb. I hate it. I never have an answer, and I wish they’d ask a different question.

    Britta is right. Focusing on living life right now rather than what will be in five years is the best way to go. Be the best you can be at every moment and honestly reflect on what you’ve done. Those experiences will inform the decisions that will shape future you.

  3. By all means enjoy life now but it would not hurt to have a few things jotted down…maybe three or four things you might like to strive for. That way when an opportunity pops up that might advance one of your goals, you will be more likely to see it as that knock on the door and you can choose to answer or not. If you don’t hear that knock, you won’t answer it and that potential opportunity will be lost. Pick one thing that you are more likely to attain and maybe one that might be a little tougher. If you don’t work toward something, you won’t ever get it. But that doesn’t mean that you have to give up your today for that uncertain tomorrow! Enjoy now but don’t forget that there is always tomorrow.

    • Thanks Corina! I think you’re right. It is important to have a balance of living in the moment and having a list of goals to focus on for the future! Also, I quite liked that blog post you linked to, it was really relevant to what I am feeling πŸ™‚

  4. You basically took the thoughts out of my head and put them in this post. I’m right there in the same boat you are. We’ll find our way…preferably without a 5-year plan!

  5. As someone older than you, there’s all sorts of advice and junk I could say. It won’t help. You are where you are on your journey Tori. Personally, I think the most important thing is that you are aware of that. You aren’t ignoring your concerns. That means you’ll address them somehow. No matter how old you are, you will always wonder what’s the next big thing or what you might be missing. I never figured out what I was going to be when I grew up – but I always had some basic life goals and that got me by. As far as the job and all that – don’t be afraid to try new things while you are free to do so. It only gets harder as you get older. More commitments, more bills. Enjoy checking out the world and see what it has to offer. You’re going to be great!!! πŸ™‚

    • Thank you so much! I have my basic goals but as you know it can be overwhelming but I know I’ll get there eventually. Thanks for reading πŸ™‚

  6. Ah, plans. They never work quite like they’re supposed to. Not house plans, building plans, secret plans, escape plans or any other sorts. I find it best to think of plans as Suggested Steps. πŸ™‚

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